Revenge of the College Marching Bands!!!
So, I am responding to Dave's request to write more posts. I was going to write this post on 1/4/05, the date of the Orange Bowl (for those of you non-sports nuts, the NCAA college football championship game), but I saw Dave's post and that the site would be redesigned, so I didn't want to mess up the process. Anyway, the Orange Bowl, excuse me, I don't want to be sued, the FEDEX Orange Bowl, has shown the completely crass and disgusting effect all this money has had on college athletics, what with it's Nokia halftime report, Sun Microsystems Timeouts, and Microsoft helmet padding (some of these are made up, but you get the point). The worst part of all though, was the halftime show. It was a superbowl-style piece of garbage and fireworks that wrecks the field for the second half and makes halftime almost an hour long. Considering that USC has one of the great all-time college marching bands, it was a travesty to see some professional singers usurping the college kids' chance to shine at the biggest football game of the year. Leading the onslaught of overrated hacks was Jessica Simpson's no-talent, coattail-riding sister: the incorrectly spelled Ashlee Simpson. She was atrocious. She was way off key, completely off tempo, and as far as I could tell, either parts of her song were supposed to be hummed, or she forgot the words to her own song! I was so ticked off by the end of the show that I was about to turn off the game and watch something less painful, like Battlefield Earth, in Spanish. But then, just before I turned to the worst movie ever, I heard the sweetest sound. Yes, you guessed it, 70,000 people booing Ashlee Simpson. Finally, America has recognized a factory-made, no-talent celebrity for what she is, nothing to spend two minutes watching, worrying, or reading about. Finally, America might be coming to its senses after all the manufactured "stars" (see: Tristan and Ryan). Yes, perhaps there will soon be an end to the degeneration of American pop culture. Perhaps "Who's your daddy?", "The Will," and especially, "The Ashlee Simpson Show" will be the lowest level of hell of reality TV. We can only hope...
In other sports news and notes, the Red Sox open the season on April 4th (that's less than 4 months!) at Yankee Stadium. Can't wait...
For your reading pleasure, and especially Dave's, this is an article about some of the recent goings ons at his old middle school in Baltimore:
http://www.thewbalchannel.com/education/4045452/detail.html
OK, I'm out like the Wutang Killer Bees on sleeping pills...
Thursday, January 6 at 8:48 PM
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